Universities Weblog

(Source: MIT)How do you not get into MIT? Bad math SATs will do it. But there are at least 52 other ways, according to the school's director of minority recruitment. Here are his top 10:

1. Don't refer to yourself in the 3rd person. It doesn't work for pro athletes and it won't work for you.
2. Don't use the flashback essay. You know, the one that envisions you receiving the Nobel Prize in Biology and attributing all of your success to your admission to MIT. Yeah, that's about as original as the obligatory standing ovation at the end of an Ashante concert. (This is NOT an endorsement of Ashante or her inability to maintain pitch control, not lip-sync at live performances, or to write lyrics that use Boo as a pronoun.)
3. Do not use words that do not exist…irregardless of how much you orientate the direction of your essay.
4. Avoid slang. Use "street cred" on your own time. If you want to "keep it real" get an "A" in calculus. That's hot!
5. Never refer to your parents as Mommy and Daddy, your dog as your best friend, or your girlfriend as your "Ride or Die."
6. In that same vein, if your mother really is your hero—you'd make your bed, refrain from calling your younger brother a mistake, and stop taking the cable box apart for poops and giggles.
7. Do not quote Holden Caufield in your essay. (It's a good way to share A ROOM WITH MARK DAVID CHAPMAN.)
8. Additionally, don't use quotes from Fountainhead or Jugghead.
9. The "Every Important Lesson I Learned in Life, I Learned From Wolverine" essay has been tried. (Feel free to ask the author how he's enjoying his PG year.)
10. There is no reason to use the word "nipple" anywhere on your application.

You can find the remaining 42 here.

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